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Author: iamjakimac

Who are you?

Who are you?

Really.

When no one is looking – who are you?

When there is no one to impress or follow or obey, who are you?

What are the things you stand for? What are the things that you are prepared to fight for?

What are the things that light you up? That make you laugh, that make you cry, that make you proud?

That make you, you?

Ever stopped to think about who you really are all that way inside?

When I got married I started thinking about who I really was now that I was no longer Jaki Mac – what were the adjectives that best described Jacqueline Quenault now? Strong, fit, healthy, happy, confident, successful, wealthy. Words like this keep me focussed, keep me on track to who I want to continue to become.

In my mind, Life is a never ending journey to self discovery, I love that every day I have a choice to take a step forward or a step back. A step closer to my adjectives, or a step back toward the safety of the cocoon of comfortable.

Do you use words or mantras to guide your path? Do you ever take time to look within and find yourself? who you really are?

I’d love to know who you discover.

You can’t be happy…

….if you are happy being sad.

“Hold on, wait a second, what do you mean I can’t be happy, if I am happy being sad?

What the heck does that mean? I am NOT happy being sad????”

Or are you?

Do you ever feel that you’re playing a role in life? That you are actually living according to others expectations, rather than how you truly feel?

No one, regardless of your situation, can be unhappy every single moment of every single day. Seriously, it isn’t possible.

Sometimes it isn’t even you that is making you unhappy – imagine living in a sea of negative voices, would you be floating or drowning in that kind of environment?

It is up to us to make ourselves happy – every day, we have a choice. We can wake and be grateful for the things around us, or we can piss and moan about how cold it is, how the birds are singing, how the sunlight wakes us up, or how the life partner you have chosen is still breathing.

Sometimes being unhappy becomes a habit. Some of you have been un happy for so many years, you’ve forgotten what makes you smile.

Today, find 5 minutes to do something that makes you smile – it might be pushing a child on a swing, running on the beach, reading, gardening, sewing, singing – it doesn’t have to cost any money, and it doesn’t have to take much time.

5 Minute Smiles – how can you not find the time for that? Unless, of course, you’re happy being sad.

 

 

 

Lessons from the Rain

Happy birthday to my brother Neville today. He would have been 61.. ha.. so hard to picture him as an old man..

The years pass, the ache lessens but the pain of what could have been never goes away. The guilt, the did i say enough, did I do enough, did I hug and love enough is always with me.

Becauses it’s birthday time for me as well, it’s always been a hard few days, this year I brought myself to the city so i could be surrounded with people, people I know and people I don’t, in an attempt to regain my perspective on the world. We get taught so much from the trials and the pains of life. This year my goal was to see what I should learn from losing him so early.

We wandered into the city and spent the day amidst the shoppers and marchers in wet n windy weather. The rain seemed to reflect my feelings on life yesterday – gloomy and heavy – yet somehow a need in order for growth. Everywhere I went, people talking about how much we NEED the rain. A simple understanding that we need the gloom, in order to blossom – Lesson Number One.

I saw People who drove past me in their Mercedes and laugh while they splashed muddy road water up my legs, and the people who sat in the rain asking for money for food, smiling and giving thanks for the coins dropped in their hat – You Do not need to be a wealthy person to be kindhearted and grateful for your blessings – Lesson Number Two

I saw heartfelt hugs and tears of goodbye at the Railway Station, I saw kids running and Dads catching and squeezing these kids hello at the airport – There is never enough time to hug, love and squeeze your family, Do it anyway. Lesson Number Three.

I also realised that being the love I had for my brother has never diminished, i just haven’t had a way of sharing it with him since 1986 – thankfully I have managed to hatch a whole tribe of people that I get to squeeze tight instead since then. I know now that love is love – its universal, and that the hugs I give one person resonates to another regardless. Lesson Number Four.

And as I sit here this morning, blubbering as has become my June 12 morning ritual since 1986, I finally realise why I do what I do.

Why I share the need for people to understand that life is short and that we need to do what makes us happy, that we need to tell the people around us that we love them, and we need to say it often, that the world runs on love, and that we need to lift the vibration of the world by sharing that love. Why I strive to impart my knowledge of how to change life, how to lift yourself by lifting others… because i have a never ending guilt that maybe I failed this wonderful man all those years ago. Lesson Number Five.

Can you do me a favour today? Stop right now and tell the person that is next to you that you love them. That you care. That the world is better off for them being in it.

Because everyone needs to know that. Everyone needs to hear that. Especially today.

For all of you who knew the man who was my brother, thank you for all that you did for him, for knowing him and loving him, and know that his memory will never fade.

You Owe It to YOURSELF

You owe it to yourself to live your best life. If you spend every day in a job you hate, with people who annoy you, and a commute which wastes half your day, you need to contemplate doing something different.

We are here on earth for a limited time – when did the rules change to say that we have to do shit that we hate the whole time we are here?

Some people go through the whole of their lives doing what is expected of them – by family, by their friends, by their school teachers and by their upbringing. They fear going against the current – they fear standing out, standing up for themselves. They fear rejection, failure, defeat. They lead lives they hate, for people that don’t have their best interests in mind.

Why?

Because to break free is not easy. Because it hurts. Because it gets uncomfortable. Because it is inconvenient. Because it is scary.

People who jump out of the box that they have spent years living in, will always come across resistance. “Whoa up there girl, you are not supposed to be successful – you’re a single mum, you have no job, jaysus, you even live in a tent!” My plans for you involve you staying right where you are, where I can keep an eye on you, control you through your inability to see the future as less fearful.

Sorry.

Being homeless is not in my long term plans. Being poor is also not in my future. Living from week to week, making biscuits and selling door to door is no longer in the equation either. I will succeed, regardless of my past situations, or circumstances. I come from a long line of successful people, and I will raise my children to be the same. My kids never knew we were homeless, they thought we were camping. They didn’t know I didn’t have the money to feed us all, they thought I was dieting.

Life is about perception. Imagination. Creativity.

We have inside us the genius, the kindness, the goodness and the capabilities to make our lives better.  We CAN choose to make our worlds a better place to be.

Yes we will hurt. Yes we may fail. Yes it will be difficult, but no more uncomfortable than continually playing small.

Yes, you will make enemies along the way – that’s life isn’t it? But imagine the people you can help, that can learn from your experiences, that you can empower with your story of success.

The only way to be truly living a life of freedom is to be unapologetically you. No longer governed by past habits, fear or other people’s opinion of who you should be.  Broken free of their low expectations of you.

Of course they will ridicule you, reject you, fear you – but in the end they will all want to be you. Rise up. Speak Your Words. Live YOUR best life.

Ask yourself, how can I help more people? How can telling my story empower people to rise, to make a stand, to make a difference?

Everyone has a story.

Even you.

What story are you telling yourself, and more importantly, what story are you showing your children?

Come join the movement – YOU CAN TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE FB Group – we are changing lives every single day. 🙂

 

Every Day in Every Way, I’m Getting Better and Better

Do you have a Mantra?

Mantra. Brainwashing. Same Same.

The way I see it, the words we speak, think, whisper to ourselves, create the life we lead, so we have to do our best to make sure it is positive.

What are some of your favourite sayings? Are they kind?

Years ago I used to chant the following, whenever I walked for exercise.. “thin and healthy, successful and wealthy”.. and sure enough, over time I achieved all of these.

I hit menopause, my hormones went haywire and I fell into the trap of “nothing is working” – sure enough, I gained 20 kilos effortlessly… Hmm, perhaps I should investigate this mind/body connection a little further.

I have always believed in what you declare, you can achieve and I have used this as a “rule for my life” – manifesting all kinds of goodness, but health?? Would the same principles work with a health related issue?

I read an article recently about the French Doctor, Emile Coue, who treated many of his patients with the same method.

He asked them to repeat over and over, “every day, in every way, I am getting better and better”.  According to the article, he is hailed as a Miracle Worker. He is attributed for curing so many people, of all kinds of ailments, his results are nothing short of amazing..

But, what if he didn’t cure them at all? What if the mantra he asked to be repeated is the actual power?

What if we have the ability to heal ourselves of all kinds of illnesses, using the power of Autosuggestion?

I , once again, have recently used myself as a guinea pig. Whispering this mantra, repeating it over and over again, as I walk, as I shower, as I did the washing up… Anytime I had the opportunity to reflect, I did, and still do.

Who would like to join me? Who is interested in taking the time to heal themselves, to use positive language in an attempt to allow their body and their mind to regain balance.

Dr Emile says that the action of imagination is more powerful than will. We possess within us a force of incalculable power, which when directed in a conscious and wise manner, gives us the mastery of self, and allows escape from physical and moral illness, and allows us to live in relative happiness, in whatever situations we find ourselves in. Click the link to download his book on Autosuggestion, it is an interesting read.

I know I feel much better. I know I feel less stressed at my health issues, I know I have lost bulk weight in a short space of time, I know that I can see myself with a gentle heart now, with love, and I feel more of a need to honour myself for the first time in my whole life.

I know, without a doubt that “every day, in every way, I am getting better and better”.

You can find me here on Social Media – Come, tell me what your experiences are…

 

Simple Steps to Transform Your Life

We all have something in common – everyone wants to know the secrets of having it all – living their best life – being the best version of ourselves that we can be.

And we are all very capable of making massive transformation – often a total 180 degree turn around – and quite conceivably in a very short space of time, after all who would be interested if I said “Transform your Life in 17.5 Years?”.

No, we want quick. We want visible. We want practical. AND we want it now!

Significant and long lasting transformation shouldn’t take forever, but it will mean that you must be open to embrace the change, and commit to having to step beyond your current habits or lifestyle.

Are you prepared to give something up in order to gain positive change? Are you prepared to face some challenges, perhaps an obstacle or two, in order to lead your new life? A life filled with health, happiness, success, wealth, growth, travel, whatever your heart desires?

What you do in your daily life is what I like to call your signature lifestyle  – your daily habits create your reality, whether you like that or not, it is true. You are where you are because of your past choices.

If you wish to change your life, make better choices. Empowered Decisions, and then take the inspired action required.

Living your life mission is important – sharing the gift that you have been given is paramount – understanding how powerful you truly are, is mindblowing. Everyone has a story. Everyone has been given lessons on Earth in order for them to be able to assist others out of that same situation.

Life transformation is not hard, but it takes commitment to yourself.

Knowing WHY you are wanting change, knowing who will benefit from your transformation, knowing who is on your team, and also who doesn’t clap when you win – all of these things are life changing.

Find the time. Listen to yourself. Make yourself the priority. Pick yourself First.

Keep your eyes on the You CAN Transform Your Life FB Group, the I AM Jaki Mac FB Group for the upcoming information on the 5 Day Challenge that is coming really soon.

 

 

Who Drags You UP?

Part of making a new life, a transformation for the better, is surrounding yourself with people who lift your spirits, who are on your side, cheering you on, either as a team-mate or from the sidelines.

Do you have those people in your life?

Who are the people that drag you UP, as opposed to the energy vampires posing often as a friend?

Who are the people that you have in your team, that are there through thick and thin, who are available to listen, console, celebrate, commiserate with you?

Do they make up the majority in your life? Do they outweigh the naysayers, the negative Nancy’s, the disruptive Dan’s and the vampirous Veronica’s?

Take a minute today to think about the people closest to you – Are they on your side? Or is it time for a few courageous conversations?

Love what Matters. Follow Your Heart. Make Yourself Happy. Transform Your Whole Life

I couldn’t have been more wrong…

I thought I was healed.

I thought I had done “all the work” that has soothed the wounds of domestic violence all those years ago.

I thought I am now strong, capable, able to stand in front of crowds of people and share my story of success and how I will never classify myself as a victim.

Till this week.

A policeman arrived at my door with a subpoena to appear in court to give evidence.

Evidence I had been assured that was given confidentially – which apparently was a lie.

I feel betrayed. By the system, by the Law. and by the people entrusted to uphold it.

Instantly I was a crying mess.

Within seconds my body has gone into fight or flight mode. All the emotion, the pain, the hurts, I thought had been long healed come flooding back.

The physical responses to stress – the sweating, the tears, the shaking, the urge to run, all appear within seconds.

As the law bullies and intimidates me with threats of going to jail for failing to appear, I want to vomit.

I can’t think straight, I can’t reach out my hand to take the papers, I am emotionally damaged, and I am crying uncontrollably.

I am far from healed. My trauma remains ever present, hidden beneath a thinly veiled attempt at normality after all of these years.

I am angry.

I am pissed off that the system doesn’t care for the victims or the witnesses one bit. There is no compassion, no understanding, no comprehension of what has just been uncovered. There is no clue of the PTSD recurrence his presence is causing, nor does he care.

Just take the paper lady – and show up on time.

I hate it.

I hate the fact that I have to wear this badge.

I hate the fact that still after all these years of education and campaigning that still women are being treated unfairly and are dying at the hands of a domestic partner.

I hate that I have to tell this story to help people understand the implications of their actions. That the hurt never heals. That the pain you inflict on another doesn’t just end at divorce time. The agony of it remains.

Forever.

Enough is enough.

 

As the world gets busy –

and pressure to achieve mount up, I stop to reflect on what truly matters.

My health, my husband, the health and happiness of the people in my world, these are the things that are important to me.

Not the deadline for releasing a new book – or publishing a new blog post. Yeah, they matter, but they aren’t my priority.

The gorgeous husband of mine currently works away, so I only get to see him every few weeks. And when he is here, I devote my time to us. To making memories, to doing stuff together and having fun.

There is plenty of time to work when he isn’t here – so if you message and I don’t answer straight away, please understand that sometimes Life is being lived elsewhere.

Are there times in your life, where your attention is anywhere other than where it should be? Do you feel like you bring your work home, or that the local gossip interferes with your home life?

Time to take stock, my friends, reevaluate what matters.

And return to self.

You matter. Your family matters. Facebook can wait.

I Am Going To Die

Hopefully not soon but I am fully aware that it will happen. You will die. My pets will die.

My parents, and siblings will too.

In fact, some already have.

Very unexpectedly. Much too early. Without a chance to say goodbye.

And that is the very reason that I refuse to let the world pass me by.

I won’t wait till the “right time”  – I refuse to linger until I am in a nursing home to wish I had looked outside at the clouds. I won’t wait until the hand I hold is leathery and cold to say I love you.

I will speak my truth. I will share the love in my world.

I didn’t stay in a profession I hated, just to pay the bills. I created a life I love.

I moved to the beach. Because I wanted to see if I liked living by the water. And as it turns out, I do.

Never will be a good time to walk barefoot in the grass, or play with the kids in the backyard. There will always be washing to do, housework to finish, assignments to write, bills to pay. You will never find the time for fun unless you start today. Consciously, making an effort to bring love back to your life.

Why are we now made feel than unless we push ourselves every single day, we cannot be classified as having lived a successful life?

Why is it that we so often leave the words unsaid, until we no longer have the chance to utter them?

Why are we always searching for more, when really simplicity is the answer?

Time is running out.

What are you doing right this second?

Does it bring you joy?

Get up from your desk – go outside, smell that fresh air, bask in the sunshine, notice the frangipanis in bloom.

Take ten deep breaths. Remind yourself why you are alive. Feel the life force inside of you.

Go ring a friend. Better still, go visit them. Roll up at their door after a roadtrip to just say “I missed you.”

Hug your partner. Tell your kids you love them. A lot.

Bake for your neighbour, cut the lawn of another. Love more. Send the ripples of heart out far and wide.

We are not here just to Live, then Die. We are here to love. To share that Love. To bring joy to our own lives and in doing so create the ripples that extend all across your pond.

You matter.

You matter to me. You matter to the Universe.

Don’t wait until you’re dying to begin to live your life, start now. TODAY.